My Own Melody

Christian Music With A Message...



Let me begin by saying, as I begin, my mind is filled with a thousand questions, number one, what am I doing this for?  I do not find this to be the norm for me. Lately I have been questioning myself as to whether the norm is really good enough for me, and that, with the help of an almighty God, I cannot, willingly, step out of my comfort zone and strive to do better.  I know that in myself that would never be done because, as with most people, I have conveniently excused myself from getting involved in or doing any more than just what I feel is required of me.  I have been thinking, as I sit alone in contemplation, what mark or advancement is my life to make upon humanity?  Am I to live and to die unnoticed, unaccomplished, unfulfilled?

It is not my intention, it has never been my intention, to obtain what the world classifies as success.  Their definition is usually self-centered, hollow and vain; I find little comfort or accomplishment in this type of success.

So many times individuals with a sincere desire to motivate only succeed in putting themselves on the hot seat and fail in accomplishing their goal. There are some people who simply cannot be motivated.  It is not my intention to be critical or to make fun of anyone but attempt to get people to STOP! LOOK! LISTEN!  Stop their status quo ideas of anything is adequate, look at themselves and their possibilities and potential, and listen to their inner feelings or conscience.  Deep down I know that my attitude about life just isn’t really what it should be, and, as an excuse, I tell myself I really don’t know too many people that cannot improve.   To the wise, comparing yourself to others is a foolish action, but, in a time when everything and everyone seems to be mediocre, it becomes acceptable.  It is not my intention to become someone special or to stand out in the crowd; I have a genuine desire to make a difference in the lives of those who wish to excel. I do not wish to say “Look at me” or “Do as I do” but to point individuals to the One who is my inspiration, the One who is providing me with the strength to accomplish my intentions.

I have been telling myself for some time that it is long past time to stand up and to be counted, but as the wave of doubts and inadequacy flood my conscience I begin to falter.  Why me?  I’m not really good enough or knowledgeable enough.  There just really isn’t a good enough excuse that can stand on it’s own or that can’t be defeated by a superior answer.

What does all of this have to do with my music?    For the past three years, or since I began to write, I have noticed a gradual change, or switch, in my priorities.  What I thought was important or what I felt I had to do to be happy was revealed to me as only my willingness to accept what the prince of this world wanted me to do.  Being honest with myself, doing what is required by a worldly standard is sin.  Going with the flow or taking the easy road is quite acceptable in a sadistic world but will have little or no positive value in a eternal sense.   I have not arrived, but I have been made to know that an honest, persistent effort must be made to change or to improve.  I do not believe, given the statistics, that life is going to improve or that the difficulty factor is going to relent.   It will only prove to worsen, and, if governments and external forces have their way, we will no longer have the freedoms to pursue our goals and dreams.   Our futures will be sculptured or formed by our determination to advance or, in many cases, to survive.  I do not feel that this should be considered a defeat or that this is totally negative.  Out of the human spirit more that two hundred years ago came the great experience which later became what we as divinely blessed called America. Once you have tasted freedom there is no going back, it will forever remain burning in the hearts of those who call themselves free.

The songs I have written were not intended as a means of personal gratification or entertainment but an honest expression of thanksgiving and worship.   Many of my songs exposed my inner feelings and told what I was dealing with at that moment.  I only know what I felt; I only wrote what I had experienced or was experiencing at that moment.   Maybe that should remain only my concern, but I believe that we can learn, if we allow our hearts to be opened, from the trials and experiences of others.  I hope this to be the case, but under any circumstances, I am placing everything into God’s hands and allowing him to use what he has lovingly given me.

If you allow yourself to listen, for whatever the reason, forget about the lack of professionalism and the absence of talent, the true value or treasure is in what is being said.  I am not a professional.  I have no title or elegant sounds to impress or raise your physical emotions.  That is not what I am all about.  If you will sincerely allow yourself to listen, my prayer is that you will be touched by the Spirit of God and that He will enrich your life with the blessings of heart felt worship.     GLH