We were created in the likeness and image of God; and, God, in His intimate plan for man, yearns to be loved and adored (Matthew 23:37). For any relationship to be exceptional and life giving, intimacy must be an essential part. The problem in society today is that everything is taken out of context; and, we use our worldly desires to justify our sinful passions and lust. Personal intimacy, or the act of being intimate, has nothing to do with sexual impropriety or perversion; and, no matter how hard we try to justify our inappropriate actions, God will hold us accountable for our choice to revel and refuse to obey.
Intimacy generally refers to the feeling of being in a close personal association and belonging together. It is a familiar and very close affective connection with another as a result of a bond that is formed through knowledge and experience of the other. Genuine intimacy in human relationships requires dialogue, transparency, vulnerability, and reciprocity. The noun “intimate” means a person with whom one has a particularly close relationship. In human relationships, the meaning and level of intimacy varies within and between relationships. Intimate conversations become the basis for “confidences” (secret knowledge) that bind people together. Without intimacy a close relationship will not evolve or survive. But as in any relationship, certain rules or guidelines must be followed and consciously maintained.
“Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge” (Hebrews 13:4). Intimacy in a Godly fashion is not evil or tarnished. It does not come and go taking its justification and pleasure from evil thoughts of adulteration and acts of sinful disobedience. Intimacy, the desire to belong and to be loved, is what compels you to surrender your deepest thoughts and actions. Intimacy, the desire to fulfill your inner passions, is what coerces you into surrender, to develop you into whom and what you become. Godly intimacy is what motivates you; it is not selfish or conceited but seeks to give and to share. Unadulterated intimacy must begin with God and then flow or connect with man. As we focus our affections upon God, we desire to share with Him our emotions and dreams. The longing to be a part of something meaningful and special, it becomes productive and a motivator for the good and desirable. It is God’s plan that everything is alive and fruitful, not mundane an ordinary. Our lives are to experience and proclaim the joy of the Lord. Intimacy with the Son makes you want to be more like Him. Intimacy initiates closeness, it initiates familiarity or friendship.
To sustain intimacy for any length of time requires well-developed emotional and interpersonal awareness. Intimacy requires an ability to be both separate and together participants in an intimate relationship. It results in a connection in which there is an emotional range involving both robust conflict, and intense loyalty.
Intimate behavior joins family members and close friends as well as those in love. It evolves through shared self-disclosure and candor. It is the act of being brazenly honest and open. Poor skills in developing intimacy can lead to getting too close too quickly; struggling to find the boundary and to sustain connection; being poorly skilled as a friend, rejecting self-disclosure or even rejecting friendships and those who have them. Individuals often experience the human limitations of their partners, and develop a fear of adverse consequences of disrupted intimate relationships. Studies show that fear of intimacy is negatively related to comfort with emotional closeness and with relationship satisfaction, and positively related to loneliness and trait anxiety.
If I could explain God in all His magnificence and glory, or if I could understand all that He is about, or fully comprehend His total majesty, I wouldn’t trust Him the way that I do. His mystery is what makes Him so compelling, His complete magnificence is what draws me to Him. If I could completely understand Him, than I would think of myself much higher than I do and I would minimize His importance and relevance. I wouldn’t depend upon Him the way that I know I must or rely upon His total goodness and kindness. Most of all, I wouldn’t love Him as much as I do or feel the same admiration and respect. To bring God down to my level, to say that I must understand before I will believe, in my mind, would be absolute folly and totally foolish. To understand life you must view it in its completeness, to understand God or His total preeminence you must view Him the same way. In every aspect of life there are positives and negatives, there are those things that I anticipate and there are those things that I have learned to reject or to loathe. I am fearful of God’s wrath but that does not give me a reason or cause me to hate or loathe God. “He that believeth on the Son hath everlasting life: and he that believeth not the Son shall not see life; but the wrath of God abideth on him” John 3:36. Everything in this world exists for a reason and a purpose, there is nothing that happens that He does not allow. The total excellence of God is the one thing I can rely upon. He gives me all that I need to make my day exciting and new. When I am in the storm, He gives me the strength to persevere. When I am on the mountain top, His loving presence is ever near.
There is no one so honest and open as the simple minded or so closed and deceived as those who consider themselves wise. There must be a problem before I can solve it and for me to create a problem so that I can have something to solve is total and complete lunacy. Would it not be considered advantageous or wise to enjoy or bask in the fact that I have no problem instead of making up or creating a dilemma just to have something to solve. “Let as many servants as are under the yoke count their own masters worthy of all honor, that the name of God and his doctrine be not blasphemed. And they that have believing masters, let them not despise them, because they are brethren; but rather do them service, because they are faithful and beloved, partakers of the benefit. These things teach and exhort. If any man teach otherwise, and consent not to wholesome words, even the words of our Lord Jesus Christ, and to the doctrine which is according to godliness; He is proud, knowing nothing, but doting about questions and strifes of words, whereof cometh envy, strife, railings, evil surmisings, Perverse disputings of men of corrupt minds, and destitute of the truth, supposing that gain is godliness: from such withdraw thyself. But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out” 1 Timothy 6:1:7 GLH